Some people pride themselves on “being honest.”
But I’ve learned, honesty without kindness is just…. rude with confidence.
Here’s some suggestions how we can speak truth without tearing people down (especially for bosses):
What We Want to Say: “THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE!”
What We Should Say: This fell short of expectations. Let’s figure out what went wrong and how to fix it.
What We Want to Say: “WHY YOU DIDN’T USE YOUR BRAIN?!?!”
What We Should Say: Help me understand your thought process here. Maybe I missed something.
What We Want to Say: “I DON’T PAY YOU TO MAKE MISTAKES!!!”
What We Should Say: Everyone makes mistakes, but let’s be more careful next round. This one had a real cost.
What We Want to Say: “USE YOUR COMMON SENSE LAH!”
What We Should Say: What would you do if I wasn’t here? Let’s walk it through together.
What We Want to Say: “OI BERANGAN! YOU NOT QUALIFY LAH!”
What We Should Say: This role’s been challenging. Let’s reassess where your strengths lie and how we can support you.
What We Want to Say: “EXCUSES! EXCUSES! ENOUGH!! I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT!!!”
What We Should Say: I hear a lot of reasons. Let’s take a breather and come back with focus on solutions.
What We Want to Say: “NIAMEH… BANYAK ATTITUDE PROBLEM AH YOU!”
What We Should Say: Something feels off in your approach lately. Want to talk about it?
We can mean what we say. We should mean what we say, in fact.
Just don’t be mean when we say it.
Kindness makes us effective, not weak. Like that. 💜💙🩵💚💛🧡❤️
xoxoxo, AuntyHR
The “What We Should Say” is only targeted to those staffs/employees who make very few errors occasionally. Not until you face a frequent problematic staff, you would say “What We Want to Say”. 🙂